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October 26, 2007

Posted by introspectreangel in food, health, life, movies, work, worship.
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Tomorrow, after Boy-o’s dad comes to pick him up, I will be cleaning out my cupboards and refrigerator, giving the food in them away, and making a shopping list. I’m starting over from scratch. After a decade and a half of laughing in the face of Mother Nature and willfully refusing to take care of myself, type 2 diabetes has finally come a-knocking at my door.

I’ve always had a genetic predisposition to developing it, courtesy of my maternal grandmother, who controlled hers through diet alone until she was in her 80’s, but my love of all things sugary has definitely aggravated the onset. Before I began the lifestyle changes that helped me lose 60 pounds in 2006, my lab work placed me in the pre-diabetic category, but after 9 months of intense discipline in my diet and exercise, my blood glucose dropped to acceptable levels. I had stopped smoking and my asthma had improved dramatically. And then a year ago, I started a job as a child welfare caseworker, a job that made me desperately unhappy. I was fired 8 months later, and the following month saw the demise of my marriage. Since then, depression and a lack of energy and financial resources (for weight-loss meetings and depression and asthma medications) have meant that healthy habits went on the back burner. And now, the chickens have come home to roost.

I’m a little afraid, but strangely, I’m also filled with a sense of “I always KNEW this was going to happen – and finally it HAS, so let’s get on with it now!” Inevitability. Yeah, that’s it.

geico-cavemen-restaurant.jpg I’m going to try a version of the Paleolithic diet, sometimes called the Neanderthal diet or the Caveman diet. I’m not going to go slaughtering my own food, but I’m going to try to stick to lean meat, seafood, eggs, and stuff that I could pick off a tree or dig out of the ground. And I’m going to have to make friends with herbs and spices and give up on sauces. Lots and lots of water, though that’s not really a problem, as I love water. It just takes discipline to be a water drinker, and lack of discipline is what landed me in this boat to begin with. I’ll keep juice and milk in the house for Boy-o, but snacking on fruit and seeds instead of cheese and crackers will be better for him, too. Fortunately, he loves broccoli “trees” and all manner of other raw veggies – it has just been pure laziness on my part buying packaged snacks.

So, that’s that. Change of subject…since I’m too lazy to do another complete post!

Well, I’m really hating my job…as in I have complete and utter loathing for it. No, really, I’m not kidding. I work in a call center as a customer service rep for a wireless phone service provider. I’ve done this kind of work before, in college, and for a little while right after I figured out a career in the field I majored in wasn’t in the cards for me. And it sucks. I was telling someone today that the more I work in customer service, the more I realize how much I really, really hate people. I also said that the thing about the call center industry that doesn’t make sense to me is that the entire job consists of being on the phone and being nice, yet all rewards and promotions and incentives in the company are geared toward getting to spend time OFF the phone. The people actually on the phones are the ones who keep the call center engine grinding away, who are told how important it is to sit in your chair, keep taking calls, to document all conversations quickly and thoroughly, and to move on to the next call. Doesn’t it seem kind of strange that, for doing your job well, you are rewarded with OPT (off the phone time), which means…NOT having to do your job? Or am I overthinking this?

Lastly, I watched this little piece of cinematic fluff today. It made me cry. Whether that’s because I’m overly fragile or because it’s a really good story with lots of great stuff about a compassionate and loving God, I don’t know. But I do love Ben Stiller. And seeing Anne Bancroft made me smile, because she was one of my very favorite actors of all time.

It really made me want to go back to church.


In the year 2006 December 30, 2005

Posted by introspectreangel in chaos, health.
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In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Stop checking my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning.

Get your resolution here

in other words, take my anxiety meds as prescribed so i can sleep through an entire night.

open up and say "ahhh" December 18, 2005

Posted by introspectreangel in health.
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“beefy red uvula” – that’s the phrase the ER doctor used as she was examing me, thereby turning my strep throat into a “teachable moment” for her nurse. and now i can’t get it out of my head. beefy red uvula – YUM.

sick kid September 6, 2005

Posted by introspectreangel in Boy-o, health.
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UGH, it is SO HOT in this house!

by the way, i neglected to mention that i am NOT in fact, a bad mother, and i DID in fact take Boy-o to the doctor. and he has an ear infection and a touch of stomach flu. i’m thinking that ear infection explains why he’s been tripping over his feet more the last few days. so today Boy-o got his first ever “big bag of drugs” from the pharmacy. an antibiotic, ear drops for pain, anti-nausea gel that i rub into his little wrists (for the vomitting) and over-the-counter immodium for the diarrhea. he’s on the BRAT diet – bananas, rice, applesauce, and toast.

poor baby boy.

progress comes in baby steps. August 26, 2005

Posted by introspectreangel in chaos, health, life.
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today i paid another $100 on my hospital ER bill, and i paid off the radiology bill entirely. i also took a settlement offer on an old southwestern bell bill and paid 60% of the balance to have the debt forgiven. i’m told it will show up on my credit report as “settled in full” instead of “paid in full”. but that’s gotta be better than, “yo, she ain’t paid nuthin’ on this bill, fo’shizzle!” (although i can’t see experian and trans union using that particular vernacular – those equifax fuckers though – i wouldn’t put it past them) next up is getting an old warrant paid off so i can finally get my driver’s license in this new state and claim state residency for school tuition purposes.

life moves forward. Boy-o and i are going home to this weekend since husband is working. all three of us will go next weekend for the labor day holiday.

in general, i tend to be skeptical of doctors… July 7, 2005

Posted by introspectreangel in depression, family, funny, health.
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…the medical establishment, and most types of medication. now, i’m not anti-medication, christian scientist, jehovah’s witness, or just plain stupid – merely skeptical. i have allergy-induced asthma, and i’m prone to bronchitis, pneumonia, and upper respiratory infections at certain times of the year. i’ve also done battle with clinical depression at various times. nor do i want any more children in the forseeable future. all of the above are, in my opinion, conditions that justify the use of medication – anti-histamines, steroids, anti-inflammatories, antibiotics, antidepressants/antianxiety medications, and contraceptives. however, since i am, as mentioned above, skeptical of the medical establishment, i thoroughly investigate all medications before agreeing to take them. i find out what their active ingredients are. i ask the doctors to explain to me how they are going to work, and why they are better than an alternative drug or no treatment at all. i consider myself to be a responsible and informed healthcare consumer, doing my part to hold down america’s astronomical healthcare costs. before i go any further, i want to make sure that i say i have done no research whatsoever to back up the opinion i am about to put forth. i have no sources to quote. i’m relying strictly on my common sense here, and my common sense tells me that it is primarily stupid people who are helping to drive up the costs of healthcare. people who run to the doctor with the attitude of, “don’t explain what’s wrong with me, just give me a pill to fix it”. people who don’t bother to get educated about how the pill they are swallowing works. people who think, “well, if it worked to fix this, then it must also work to fix THIS.” it’s already been established that the overuse of antibiotics has contributed to the emergence of antibiotic resistant bacteria. the same consumer mindset that has caused this development is also at least partially responsible for rising costs. i call it the “magic pill” attitude.

i have a gigantic mosquito bite on my ankle that has swelled up to the size of a pea and it itches, so last night i was looking around for some hydrocortisone cream to put on it. ok, i’m familiar with home remedies such as toothpaste, but i find hydrocortisone cream works best for me. my mother-in-law hands me the aloe vera from the fridge and says, “use this”. i turn the bottle around and read, “apply generously – aloe vera moisturizes, cools, and soothes dry skin and sunburns.” i look up and say, “this is for dry skin and sunburns, not insect bites.” she shrugs and says, “well, i use it for everything.” i say, “like the dad in “my big fat greek wedding” who uses windex for everything?” she says, “exactly!”

see? magic pill.

i understand that i can’t expect everyone to know the difference between ibuprofen, aceteminophen, and naproxen sodium. but if you’re taking them, you should at least know that they are pain and fever relievers. nor do i expect everyone to know the difference between loratadine and diphenhydramine, but if you’re taking them, you should know that both are antihistamines and antihistamines are for allergies. same thing with decongestants – you don’t take one of those for a runny nose, only a stuffy one. common sense. when my father-in-law complained of a headache and stuffy nose last weekend, she handed him the benadryl. i know i’m not off the mark here, because he looked at her like she was crazy and then got himself the tylenol sinus.

i wonder if she rubs aloe vera on her forehead when she has a headache…

so, my dr. must have realized i took her magazines… August 3, 2004

Posted by introspectreangel in health.

so, my dr. must have realized i took her magazines or something, because she called me at work today to tell me that some of my test results showed some abnormalities (pre-cancerous cells) and that i need to come back for another look.

since i happen to be miss “worst case scenario” 2004, i immediately called my husband and extracted from him a promise to remain close to my family should i die, even if he remarries, so our son will know his grandparents and aunt and uncle. ok, so i’m aware i’m probably overreacting. i’m sure everything is fine.

everything is fine, everything is fine, everything is fine. if i repeat it often enough, it will be true.

*shaking head in embarassment* July 27, 2004

Posted by introspectreangel in health.
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ok, i haven’t posted drunk since i was a bona fide IRC addict in college. i feel just a teeny bit ridiculous.

damn, that was some good wine, though. rarely do i engage in shameless product promotion in my blog, but really – everyone should try llano estacado wines.

so, i went to the doctor today for my annual checkup, and it took TWO HOURS. all i wanted was to get up in the stirrups and have her check out my junk so i could get my birth control pills and get out of there. but i made the mistake of answering truthfully when she asked me how often i was using my asthma inhaler and i told her i was going though about one inhaler a month. that led to suspicion of a lung infection and a couple of chest x-rays, as well as prescriptions for nasal spray, a second kind of inhaler, and a nebulizer machine. then for some reason it occurred to her to ask when i last had a tetanus shot, and again i answered truthfully – at age 14. whoops! so a tetanus booster and 5 tubes of blood later, i finally escaped. for my revenge, i took a couple of magazines from the waiting room – this doctor actually keeps hers up to date. 🙂